


Meekness

by saturnux



Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Light Angst, One Shot Collection, Short, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-09
Updated: 2017-08-09
Packaged: 2018-12-13 05:46:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 4,553
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11753313
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/saturnux/pseuds/saturnux
Summary: Mild behaviour is virtue.





	1. Sentimentalism

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Our life is in different pages.

Sitting on the bed by the windowsill, her weepings could be heard in the night. Even the hope-promising starry sky can't make her feel reassured at this hour. Those stars have been gazed at by her already, too many times before, in her bad moments. The same thing is happening all over again.

Those teary eyes won't be looking the way he stands.

A blue boy with whitened hair, with full on black clothing that could just merge into the dark room's shadows is gazing at her in a pitifully weak ray of hope.

"How can you just stand there, and wait for me to wail and jump into your arms? If my memories are truth, you have just left, without any explanatory intent. I have told you so many times before, honesty and loyalty. These two notions are the most important. And you had to break me with unaccepting only that two."

Wiping her face was only a waste of time, her crying won't stop even if she wants it to. The quiet room is only filled with her sounds, her sad gasps are just like many knifes' stabs directed right into his chest.

He wanted to be with her, oh how badly he wanted to.  
But his life story makes things a lot more difficult than she thinks they are. He lives an awfully dangerous life now, a human company beside him is just not admissible anymore.

"You don't know, [y/n]. You don't want to know why i was away for so long. I don't want to tell you either, i want to keep you safe. I want you to live the peaceful life you always had.  
The thought of grabbing you out of it is horrible, you know?"  
A sorrowful smile crept up on his face, and when finally her cries had quieted down, he's droplets of salty tears have fallen too. And that's when she finally glanced at him. 

"K-kaneki..."

She couldn't hold herself back anymore. Honestly she wanted to run up to him the time he appeared in her small, ordinary apartment, but her pride and the post-disappointment strongly held her back.

She got up quick and hugged him very tight. Pushing his weepy face into her chest. He instantly wrapped his arms around her waist, and sobbed aloud.

"And the thought of you never having this peaceful life is the worst. This is not the way you have chosen..."  
She stroked his hair, trying to pacify the emotional storm in himself.

Even if they live for each other, they are not allowed to live together. 

And the night just goes on, their reunion was a transformational experience for both of them. 

But even after all that, they still couldn't go together on the same path.


	2. Fruit

* * *

I dug crescents on his pale shoulders, but he only let out a wince of pleasure by the tender pain. As i embraced him, the warmness of his skin made me melt into the mattress. And once again flaming up my female parts, i felt the sex lingering in this little room. We could've been close to materializing mist on the windows. When our tongues swirled around each other, i wished we could just drown like that and die finally, let go of this tangible body, and leave this prison world. How beautifully could we finish our lifeline, without any after-pain or guilt. Our doings were our only source of joy after all. "Let me get on top of you now." I spoke with such confidence that i'm so unfamiliar with, it could be gained by my loss of virginity from ten minutes ago. He also found my change in behaviour odd, but he goes along with anything i wish to do right now. But before that i pulled him in for another kiss, only backing away for quick breaths, tilting our heads either left or right. We quickly took a turn, and when i shifted, my head moved higher, making him lift up his own to reach my lips longingly. I sat down on him and just like that, i started a motion with my hips. With that driving him completely wild. He furrowed his eyebrows and let go of himself, moaning into my mouth without shame. Kaneki by now wanted to quicken my pace like crazy, and hastened me impatiently. He placed both of his hands on my hip to make me grind onto him deeper, but i resisted. I wanted to take this slowly now, and with only a look he understood it. I glanced at the floor for a mere minute, noticing the shirt he's been wearing for the day, only to make it end up discarded at the evening. When he got rid of it, i kissed his revealed skin in gluttony. His neck, his chest, and the young male just mewled in the bliss i caused. "[y/n], please don't be so slow. I-," But my lover's pleading got interrupted by his audible gasp. I slammed my bottom down more harshly and squeezed my insides, to take a revenge on him and his avidity. My hand was caressing his chest, a zone where he's very sensitive i noticed. This likely almost drove him over the edge. "No... this feels too good, s-stop." His panting was erratic and loud, his throat was getting dry and his whole body was like an oven. He threw his head back, sinking it into the pillow. Me knowing he was really close, stopped and looked at my beloved's face. He looked so lustful, with half-lidded eyes that was gazing into mine, it not only made me proud, but also insanely aroused. I felt love and adored him, my head was dazed. Like he has been soaked in some kind of liquor, that i licked off to make me drunk immediately. "I don't want to reach my finish yet. I want to cum while being as close as i can to you." While speaking he smiled at me lovingly. He was not being perverted at all, but he did spoke like an adolescent boy having their first time taken, thinking now he's the big boy. My face blushed, but i still just smiled and nodded. So he grabbed and pushed me down on my back, and we were back at how we started. He thrusted deeper into me, making me see stars. "Y-you can go faster now." I unwillingly moaned out a plea, losing myself completely under him. He did without a word. He was panting heavily while dipping his head into my neck to suckle on it lazily. Our orgasm was getting closer and the tension got a lot heavier. The feeling and the audible sound of our skin slamming together and his last kiss made me cum harder than any i had before. His red face was also a really adorable sight to look at while coming right after him. I was his first, so it makes sense that he couldn't take it any longer than that. But this was all perfect for me. He collapsed beside me and covered us with the blanket on the bed. His breathing was still heavy, and he was very exhausted. He looked at me amazed like a child would in a candy shop. "With you, i couldn't get any luckier."


	3. You're a piece of art

Finally, the sunny spring reached today's weather.  I had the time to rest in this blooming park to clean up my chaotic head. On an unoccupied bench, as i hoped.

I didn't have to worry about it, it was still school time and close by i could only see an old couple sitting there, enjoying their time. Probably with a small grandchild playing around.

I sat there for mere minutes absorbing the relaxing sound of the fountain in the middle of the park, mixed with the soothing birds' chirping sounds.

I grabbed my book filled with sketches out of my bag to draw, using my surroundings for references.

I glanced around for a good source, figuring out the prettiest sight here is the fountain in the front.

Drawing the lines in my sketchbook, i noticed the little details of the monument. Nailing the anatomy of the statue that was "pouring" the never-ending water out of a vessel in her hands.

Not sure for how long, but i was getting into it. Until i looked away from the sculpture for a second.

Not so far from me someone was sitting on a bench too.  
It was a seemingly reserved boy reading, and i thought he's getting completely sucked up into the fiction. I unknowingly beamed a small smile. Unable to leave the sight with my eyes, i found myself tracing his outlines.

Paying close attention to his hands as it was holding the book lightly, the pale fingers, and the tips of them. His comfy clothing that won't follow any superficial fashion, but his own style. The way his eyes followed the words, as he sometimes made an expression or gaping his mouth while rereading a sentence. Furrowing his eyebrows when something really touched his heart.  
I stopped drawing him at one point. After staring at him for such a long time, i felt heat on my face and looked down at what i made.

It looked fine, except, on the drawing his eyes looked like they where fixated on me.  
And i glanced at him again, seeing those eyes staring right back, like on the paper. I gasped and started packing up because i couldn't handle the embarrassment. I wanted to go home, but then i figured he deserves an apology so i paced towards the seat where he was sitting.

My heart picked up the pace, because while approaching him i got a better view of his face.  
He looked adolescent, with hypnotic dark eyes trying to peer into my head.  He was reeking child-like innocence. The dark haired boy seemed startled when i bowed down in front of him. Exclaiming apologies for acting strange and staring at him for longer then it is socially accepted. Plus drawing him without a permission.

"Uh, don't worry! I wasn't bothered by it or anything, so no need to apologise to me like that." Letting his hands down after expressing to me it's okay, he aimlessly scratched at his face.  
"I couldn't stop looking at you either."


	4. Summer smiles

The sunlight danced between the lush grass, tickling our feet as we walked. I absorbed the warmness of the wind that soothingly caressed my tinted cheeks.

Haise, who was just unable to hold back a grin kept insolently glancing at me. My eyes were closed for a few seconds, preventing from getting them dry by the fast moving air.  
I opened one to peek. Knowing well his attention wasn't on the way in front of him.

He pecked my lips before a snicker escaped him, with mischief in his eyes. He turned his head away in an instant, childishly smiling at the babyblue sky.

The road was leading us to a small valley, with the wildest beauty of flowers overgrown all over the place. That was hidden from the common people, until Haise found it in his freetime whilst searching for a fitting place to read.

"If that meadow really is, i quote you, breathtaking. You can consider me always following you going out there. Not letting you be alone and reading away your books all day."  
I poked his shoulder.

"I'm fine with that. I can read with a quiet company." He looked into my eyes, his smiling agitating me.  
"Funny."

Haise informed me that we were close to arrival, so i ran off. But it was a lazy run, because in the long knavish it was quite hard to step fast. In the distance i was able to see the field of flowers owning a different colour each.

My playmate reached me fast enough so he could catch my hand from behind, but i struggled out of his hold for another chase. The field was whelming up our laughs as we were paying no care to the world.

I slumped down under a willow tree to rest, panting heavily in the pleasant umbrage. Laying there i was waiting for Haise to take his place beside me, but he was nowhere in sight.

I sat up looking around until he crept up behind me, putting his hands on my waist to scare the soul out of me.  
The tips of his fingers ran amok on the most sensitive places he could possibly find.

I could only yelp by the sudden attack while weakly trying to peel his hands off of me. I turned around somehow while my loud titters filled his ears like a melody.

"No, no, no, no...! Stop it!" I couldn't handle the tickle fights that he always had to surprise me with. Haise laughed along with me for a short amount of time till he finally stopped the torturous deed.

I tiredly let out a giggle.   
"I hate you...!" Then i lightly slapped his shoulder, huffing like an angered child.

"You're so mean sometimes, [y/n]-chan." That cheeky grin of his never left his face, until i pulled his head down whilst holding the nape of his neck.

My tongue touched his own in a liplock he could barely gasp. My need to wipe off that dainty smile of his was my main excuse. As he breathed through the kisses i found myself tugging at his hair, grabbing the entangled strands of either black or white.

Haise abruptly pulled away and calmed his breathing down. A slight red on his cheeks was visible enough for me to form a loving smile.

"Where was that coming from so suddenly?" An expression of disbelief played on his face, not being used to this kind of fierce affection coming from me.  
Payback can be a tricky one, you see.


	5. Porcupine

I whimpered with tear drenched eyes while the pained look of his never left me.

I wanted to say something, but a warm hand cupped on my cheeks silenced my words. The wet spots on the tissue paper made me think about how this stressful style of living left me completely weak.

Left me vulnerable. And now i just weep like a little girl.

Troubled by the tenderness i backed away slightly, towards the edge of the bed. Staring at my hands on the white sheets, i felt embarrassed. Such burden in my life is incomparable to his. I wanted to be the comforting one, not the other way around.

"Ah, sorry. I just wanted to wipe away the tears." Worry painted his expression, but in truth he just wanted to give me some loving affection.  
I can see it now.

It's funny when what people give to others is what they actually have a desire for.

I mopped my face in a rush and spoke,  
"I'm sorry, this is stupid. I don't know why am i crying... But, you don't have to worry."

Furrowed eyebrows formed on his face, his skeptical body language made me a little uneasy. Without saying a word i already knew what he was thinking.

"No, no. It's not stupid. And i'm always worried about you, no matter how many times you tell me not to be." 

Now two palms on my face brought my head closer to his, Haise placed a lingering kiss on my lips.

The familiar sensation left me at ease, and i hugged him by the waist. He did the same, but kept one caressing hand on my wet cheek.

"I love you. You know that, right? How can you even think that i will leave you here in pain."

I started sobbing on his shoulder, letting out everything that was building up inside.  
"I just want to make you happy."  
That's not fair.

Haise has always been unhappy. But never broke down in front of anyone to show how he really felt. Not even me.  
Still, he takes care of me like a parent, when he also needs a lot of warmth.  
Don't do this Haise. I will be happy when i know you feel loved enough.


	6. Golden

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mature content ahead

Light scrapes and bruises have been healing continuously on his silverish skin under my damp thighs, those that have been trembling by an overgrown excitement and feeling of control. Our actions have been happening since early midnight, and by then the sun was already about to rise into a dawn. 

After a move that brought him dangerously close, he hugged my waist desperately begging for the so long wanted relief.  
In the warm embrace, moans of pleas and desperate sighs against my ear gave me a desire for mischief, so i heaved out a breath in my mirth.

"Who's the strong now?" 

I pushed him out of the grip, and placing my hands on his upper body, i loomed over him. I lifted myself up for another drawn-out movement, and ran my tongue under his jawline.

"I'm not going to give in so easy. Don't act- Don't act so cocky now!"

I delayed to stare down at him, half-lidded eyes making him frown out of the huge need to be released.

"Stop with that! Or we'll switch places."

"No we will not. You're ruining the fun."

"Your fun."

Afterwards, i rode him obediently with a frantic pace. We kissed in so much pleasure that our orgasms were getting untied a little too soon. With the sun finally being up, we both finished. The sticky cum of his dribbled out of me gradually when i sat up. He stared at it boldly while i sluggishly reached for a tissue paper.

"For how long are we going to try?"  
I clean myself up with his help, while asking that overused question again.

"Until you get pregnant. Obviously."

"It's not going to happen. Kaneki, you know we can't..." I lowered my face, the sorrow rippling my eyes before closing them.

"Weren't you more positive before? But hey, i still can't give up." He lifted my chin upwards gently, and an understanding smile beamed his features. Lowering his eyelids his lips grazed mine. It grew into a slow kiss, tongue touching tongue.

"I know how much it means to you. So it's important to me."

For a good while we whispered and held each other tight. Then i saw the amber colour of sunshine creep through the veil before the window. Kaneki was shed under the light of gold, and so he promised me hope for a newborn.


	7. No matter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Honesty clears the path towards acceptance.

A faint light emerged from the sea's slick horizon announcing the start of the awaited dawn. The first blush of sunrise lifted the dark mood up like a flick on the switch.

My shoes were sinking into the sand. As it leaked through my open footwear, some rocks stuck under the rim of my feet. I shook them out as i rocked my legs. Kaneki was just watching the sunrise with much appreciation, truly enjoying himself on the quiet beach.

I could smell the scent of algae shoved out on the shore, scrunching my nose up once or twice by the rotted smell.

We came here during pitch black midnight. Kaneki was unable to sleep and wanted me to spend a little time with him. Telling me that as we were talking on the phone.

It would seem pretty strange of his passive self, but i was needing him just as much as he needed me. So the whole evening was passing by under our loving chatters - or more like my onesided babbling bombarded towards him, that he loved so much - until i figured we could do something more interesting together, as we both couldn't lay our heads to sleep at that night.

He unexpectedly came up with the idea to go have a walk on the shore close by. Saying he had a true need for some time outside. With me coming along.

I felt something else behind those words, but i acted senseless towards that thought. I had complete trust in everything he decided in. I knew he was very smart and considerate.

An hour passed with nothing but holding hands, whilst walking in the cold sand jabbering about shallow things. Like he was avoiding any topic i could dive deep into, he always had small interest in what i was trying to converse about.

By now we just sat on a found abandoned deck chair. The silence he gave me was uneasy, he was really thinking deeply about something I wish I could know about. I tried peering at his eyes, but they were swiftly avoiding me.

Then finally the sound of his reserved voice reached my ears,

"[y/n], what are your thoughts about... man-eaters? You know, the topic we have talked about not so long ago." This blurted out sentence caught me surprised, but Kaneki didn't look at me to see it himself.

I really wonder why was he so taciturn before asking that. Did he encounter one of these things without ever telling me?

"I'm scared of them, that's for sure. I don't like to think about them often. Why ask? Kaneki, did anything happen to you that has something to do with them?"

Tears started to gleam in his eyes. Anxiety and shock rushed through my body thinking about the worst scenarios that i thought was possible.

But i was wrong. They were not even close.

"[y-y/n], i'm... i'm one of those-"

His voice got silenced as he dipped his face into his palms, lowering his head before even finishing his sentence. Shoulders were shaking by his sobs. It was quiet now and i could only hear the distant waves of the ocean.

I thought i just slipped into a different dimension. The idea of the old world where my boyfriend was a human i can live a happy life with, was crushed.

I knew that hell awaited me when i looked into his eyes, seeing pitch black and bloody red. The shock it gave me manifested as a hitched gasp from my throat, that made Kaneki more aware of himself.

A quick hand slapped over his left eye and he looked down again. One teary eye roaming the ground and never my face.

I felt so miserable by just seeing him so undone with anxiety and stress. And i knew he was waiting for a validation from me.

I grabbed his shoulders and told him to face me. I took a hold of his left hand and cupped the side of his face. A sign of relief was seen in his eyes, while pink dust tinted his cheeks.

"I said i'll always cover you no matter what, remember? I love you, Kaneki."  
I leaned closer towards him for a kiss. He just stared at me after, looking astonished.

"Thank you, [y/n]. Thank you so much for being here. I think you're the one."


	8. Sweetness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Feeling you.

Our bare figures have lighted up the night like how you often light up a match. It felt wrong to be so greedy when it comes him, pulling on his hair lightly, bringing him closer between my legs. My heels digging his nape, attempting to feel his lips more in a different way again. I threw my head back in the sudden feeling of heaven when he tenderly lapped inside of me.

Kaneki hummed like how a cat purrs at the touch when i caressed his hair. Pushing my fingers into the whitened locks, grazing it along his nape lovingly. I could feel him smile after every subtle suck, and his fingers slowly dipped deeper into my hole, that was drenching around his mouth and the tip of his nose. "You're getting wetter and wetter after each kiss, please, come while i'm doing this."

On top of all things, he started mewling against my clit, like he was feeling the same pleasure as i did. That was my weak point, his voice. So i was unable to listen to more, i was reaching the stars already. Moving my hips against him at my ending i came around his fingers. 

I struggled to breathe out a 'you are amazing' when my back hit the mattress.  
A little bashful after my feedback his head rise above my knees, sitting down in front of me satisfied. After calming down, i bended, moving my head into his lap. I looked up to see his face undoubtedly red. 

He was watching every move i made, how my hand bounced up and down as i sucked the head to lubricate it. "Does this make you feel good?" I asked him out of habit, before making his erection disappear in my mouth. Throbbing against my cheek, he started panting along with my fastening hand.

"a-hah. yes, so please... let go now." Eyebrows knit together, he covered his mouth when he allowed slightly louder moans to slip from his lips. His eyes were shut the whole time, not daring to glance at me in fear of showing his end right down my throat. The mere thought just made him more aroused. 

I straightened properly to lick his lips in hunger for his tongue. I slowed down the pace when we kissed, his tongue confidently moving against mine. So sensual, his liplock can be.  
He makes my tongue weak just the same.

He suddenly broke it, stuttering my name, "i really can't stand it anymore-" at the right time i let go, with my mouth still latching at his body. Shamelessly i admit i meant to leave some evidence, i hated how it disappears just right after, making his cream coloured skin look more tempting than it already was. 

He abruptly crawled towards the nightstand to find a condom, he was a little tired but eager. On the edge of the bed, i helped him putting it on. "Thanks. You look so skilled when you're doing that." When i couldn't help but roll my eyes, he made himself comfortable on the sheets as i followed him.

"It's my turn, isn't it?" I gingerly rest my palms on his shoulders like the handlebars of a bicycle. Slowly, carefully i slid down, my bottom feeling his lap. He made a route on my neck with his warm tongue, the saliva on my skin leading to goose-bumps. I hug his neck to encourage him and he pushed his face in-between my breasts. He couldn't do a thing while feeling the immense pleasure of me bouncing ontop of him. 

The skin down there were getting wetter and sloppier after every motion. His voice dripping from his lips like the sweetest syrup i've ever got a taste of. I wanted to taste it all, every single sound. My kiss muffled his voice, and i let every moan out the same way. When i let go he whines for more. Then, he started to flick his tongue against my ear, and licked my jawline desperately.

I tilted my head back whining his name, and feel my orgasm rush through my being. My walls squeezing his arousal, he came along with me. After such a long, heavy breathing he asked me if i was okay, my answer was a single nod. We fell on the bed, amazingly satisfied, and slept bare naked with my arms latching onto him.


End file.
